After a lengthy hiatus, Grab Bag returns to Dozens Of Donuts. Here, we'll find and react to completely random songs from the depths of music's annals. There's no prerequisites, no regulations self-imposed. Anything can make this list if the site I'm using to discover these songs, RateYourMusic's random release generator, spits them out. This is a great way to discover new music with no attachment to something in your catalogue. Or, a dark reminder that truly horrid music exists in droves.
The positioning is based on the order in which I discovered them. The rating system similar to what DoD already enforces, in that 5 / 10 is average, not bad.
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Kittenz & Thee Glitz | Electroclash | 2001
Now this is a sleek vibe. Stripped back, simple, effective. Not at all what I was expecting from preeminent Electroclash DJ Felix Da Housecat. Perhaps 'What Does It Feel Like?' is an anomaly amidst his discography, with its fidgety percussion that aligns more with punchy Minimal Wave than anything in House. Big Beat be damned, the party happens in the crevices. Miss Kitten's monotone vocals match the infectious groove, though ultimately her presence, lyrically, amounts to nothing. It's Dance music though, do we expect anything more?
7 / 10
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Mutations Et Prothèses | Industrial | 1981
Early 80's Industrial. An era devoid of fun. Dour music for dour folk. Skirting accessibility so hard, giving way to contrarianism. Thankfully, and this is the bare minimum, 'Malaise' features a subtle, yet imperative bass line providing structure and routine to an otherwise lamentable affair. Etat Brut grunts, moans, and laments through a wave of wires and compounding Industrial noise. It's primitive, much in the sense of Legendary Pink Dots early in their unsettled career. For an art style so intent on eliciting a reaction, 'Malaise' is disappointingly tame.
3 / 10
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Waves | Post-Hardcore | 2011
Well that came and went. Apart from some adequate lyrics, there's nothing of value on 'Where Two Bodies Lie.' This is boilerplate 2000's white boy Rock. Made in 2011. Not a good look. No artistic substance, no originality. The passion and energy feels forced and contrived, caused in large part by the vocalist, Gregory Dunn, who should never touch a microphone again. I'm reminded of the worst aspects of The World Is A Beautiful Place's vocals, or any starving Northeast Rock outfit since the turn of the century for that matter. It's music for teenagers with no sense of direction. Or taste.
1.5 / 10
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Life Is Round | Jazz-Rock | 1973
Interestingly enough, Compost's 'The Ripper' shows me just how pathetic Jazz's progression has been over the past half century. When I went through a phase of trying, desperately, to enjoy modern Jazz, damn near every band, album, song I entertained sounded just like this. The quality, musicianship, structuring, tonality, pacing, insistence upon the craft. None of it has evolved. So, in that respect, I give minor credit to Compost for being 50 years ahead of the curve. However, if my knowledge of 50's and 60's Jazz was anything to scoff at, I'm sure those commendations would wither. It's fun, light-hearted, and enjoyable as a background to greater ventures. But never as the predominant focal point.
4 / 10
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Idle Moments | Hard Bop | 1965
Yeah, I don't get it. A shame, for Jazz is a critically-acclaimed genre. But I've tried countless classics, time and time again, only to come up empty and dissatisfied. Grant Green's 'Jean De Fleur' is no exception. It's the technical dilemma. Any genre that prioritizes musicianship over artistry rarely wins me over. This, primarily due to my lack of interest (ironically) in learning any kind of musical instrument. For me, it's all in the art, the passion, and the concepts. 'Jean De Fleur' just exists. There's no message or curious diversion. No structural surprises or instrumental ingenuity. Like most Hard Bop, Grant Green's music is safe, harmless, and ineffective.
2.5 / 10
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Keep On Dancin' | Funk | 1974
Ever since I exhausted Sly & The Family Stone's discography, I've been itching for some fun, creative Funk. Unfortunately, Bohannon won't be the candidate this go-around. That, or 'South African Man' wasn't the best starting point. For it feels more like a relapse. A tired dirge masquerading as Funk. Sure your head's nodding, but separate yourself from the earworm infestation, and you'll soon hear a song that's devoid of vigor, vehemence, and hope. The groove feels compulsory, as if Bohannon had no choice in the matter of its creation. And while repetitive isn't wholly a negative within Funk or Disco, the militaristic pace of 'South African Man' gives off a strange, coercive vibe. As if it's out-of-touch, bureaucratic suits creating the backbone.
6 / 10
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16 mm | Chamber Pop | 2000
Given my out-of-context approach to Grab Bag - jumping into albums and artists without the slightest of background knowledge - the Chamber Music of Jorane's 'Film III' feels fresh and enticing. However, knowing her music, I'd usher a guess (though can't say for sure) that 16 mm borrows many of the same tactics present in 'Film III.' Medieval fanfare, with organic orchestral arrangements that rise like gothic architecture and pristine, puritan vocals cascading around melodies without vocabularies. Basically, my lack of expertise on Chamber Music makes 'Film III' feel more imaginative and innovative than it, likely, is. Still, the structural oscillation makes for a graceful build, culminating in a moving portrait of peasant hope.
6.5 / 10
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Snow Goose | Symphonic Prog | 1975
This had the makings of disappointment written all over it. The overrated and archaic Symphonic Prog mixed with a band synonymous with said genre, and it's Canterbury-esque tomfoolery. While Camel's 'Rhayader' sure as hell fits that mold, to an hilarious degree, the uplifting tenor and swift pacing levies just the right balance of absurdity and complexity. It's simultaneously instantaneous and progressive, satisfying both extremes through the elegance of a migratory birdsong. Apparently there's a concept to The Snow Goose as well, in spite of its all-instrumental nature. Now I'm curious to give it a go, though I'll likely be letdown by the inevitable similarity bug.
7.5 / 10
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Have An Idea | Power Pop | 1980
After a rather rough month for Grab Bag I was eyeing The Heats, an 80's one-off Power Pop outfit, to end on a high. It stood in the face of Jazz and Rock that plagued this month, with a demeaning title and dead-end band. And while the humorous lyrics sometimes landed, other times didn't (especially when it got mildly homophobic), The Heats' 'I Don't Like Your Face' was a tad too juvenile for my tastes. And not in the lyrical department, like you're expecting. The Power Pop itself moves with bland momentum, as the amateur status of the band so clearly shows. This works in contrast to the antagonistic lyrics. All bark and no bite some would say. Which, by the way, that barking, provided by Steve Pearson, is far too tame and punitive to have any sort of rancor spewed from it.
4.5 / 10
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